... this can be it. Because I'll fully admit that tonight I'm venting... and using my blog as my journal... and if you don't want to think of me as totally whiny right this second it might be a good one to scroll on by...
My blogging has been taking a back seat lately to the giant basement cleanup I started a little over a week ago. It seems that the second trimester urge to nest and clean has arrived without the accompanying energy boost. I'm not totally shocked since I spent all forty weeks of Patch's pregnancy desperately waiting for an energy boost that never really arrived. But since I was in the first trimester and in no shape to clean up the entirety of the last flood in the basement (I cleaned the quarter of the basement I used and just looked at the rest and wanted to cry) I let it go for a while and just refused to go near the rest... but I've taken two hours each night over the last eight days and begun the process of bleaching everything inside the range of flood #6 (that would be the sixth time I've walked into the basement to find it with various levels of water running or seeping into it, in less than two years).
If we have not moved before flood #7, I might go insane. If we're here and the water creeps in either through the water table (not so bad) or from the sewer line with the clay joints and all those tree roots (very bad) I might lose my mind... The greatest challenge has been the various places the water comes in. When the water table is too high it creeps in from the east side of the house and runs from one side to the other. If the sewer backs up it comes in through the south side of the house and floods everything in sight. So when I move everything to get away from the rising water table I inevitably put it near the place where the sewer will back up if it gets out of hand and if I move everything to flee from the sewer backing up it's immediately set right in the path of the rising water table. And since the "hazmat" team that did the first sewer clean up left.... remnants of the incident... on the floors and smeared on the walls... I decided it's best not to even ask for them to come back and so I'm doing the cleanup myself.
However my body seems to think that I should just sleep all the time, day and night... so slow and steady is my current cleaning motto. Which is all one long, long way of explaining why for the first time in a very long time I haven't been blogging just about every day.
And it doesn't help that I've been in stormy little rain cloud mode this week (if you can't tell). Between someone breaking into our garage and stealing Paul's run down (and run over) old bike (which actually turned into a blessing because he found a better bike for a very good price second hand on Craiglist), and discovering that there are roughly 60 serious-criminal-offenders-of-the-type-they-register-online (and having gone through the list person by person I can say that the vast majority were very serious) in a one mile radius of our house, and waking up to local news on a daily basis that has included two missing persons (one who was found... not alive...) and two stabbings in the past week and I've pretty much been saying "we have to move... we just have to..." to Paul in a frantically hormonal (and I'm sure annoying) tone about a dozen times a day.
And the next person who says "there are people like that everywhere" to me may get an earful about how I'm tired of seeing headlines about violent crimes fairly close to my house. Because while there are "people like that" everywhere I'm ready to move someplace where there isn't quite such a high proportion. Ten miles north or south or east or west would do. Just not right here in the middle of everything, even if quite a bit is within convenient walking distance from our current place.
Also, the local refrain I see on media facebook pages of "at least it's not Detroit" is not really all that comforting.
Although what this really probably comes down to is that it's been 90 degrees and humid in the upstairs of our house today and I'm just grumpy. I shouldn't be. I'm reminding myself that this is the home stretch right now for Paul's education and that we're so blessed in so many ways that I try to remind myself of every single day... and that we've lived where we live for 22 months and that I should be able to survive two more (especially since most of our water problems have been in spring and spring is long gone).
So... my goal tomorrow is to put this week's attitude of stormy little rain cloud behind me and remember all the things that I should be thankful for... and hopefully that will give me something to write that is actually worth reading!