On Thursday I got a call from my new OBs office saying that they had to cancel my appointment to meet with the office PA (to go over paper work and talk about history) on Tuesday, and I let them know that Tuesday immediately after the appointment I was leaving for a friend's wedding and would be out of town for a week. Thankfully, they managed to squeeze me in on Friday (actually the entire office was empty the entire time I was there, which made me wonder if they have patient in on Friday at all).
Apparently things are quite busy at the moment though, so the soonest they could fit me in for an actual appointment to meet my OB was on September 20th, which will be at 33 weeks.
There seemed to be some shock at all the tests that hadn't been done, and I got the feeling that in this new office women aren't asked about all the rounds of prenatal testing, but that it's just something they tell you you're going to do. At my previous office we'd never talked about doing the twelve week tests, and my doctor with Mae had told me when I asked that if I wasn't going to consider an abortion if there were problems then there was really no point in doing them and so not having them done hadn't bothered me at all. Here apparently it's odd that I hadn't had "any sort of testing for genetic abnormalities?!?!?"
The staff was very friendly, I just have the distinct impression that they're used to having every single test run for every single mother.
I've also realized that my expectations for OBs are rather low, as I began to think of what I hoped my doctor would be like and found that the wish list was something like: I hope he's not insulting. I hope he doesn't spend the entire appointment being a condescending jerk. It would really be nice to have someone who can make it through an entire appointment without throwing out jabs about how dumb I am not to go on the pill. I hope he doesn't ask if I'd like to be sterilized every time my husband is out of the room.
And it would be nice if every single person I talk to post-partum doesn't grill me about not being on the pill. Maybe I can ask them to make a note about it this time in my chart. Because I find my temper growing shorter and shorter when it comes to all the pressure they put on moms who've just gone through childbirth to start pumping their bodies full of Class 1 carcinogens, just like I think it's disturbing that they ask a mom in the third trimester whether she's not sure she doesn't want them to go in and tie her tubes while they're doing the c-section (it may be one thing if the mother suggests it, but suggesting it to someone who's in the midst of swollen feet and an aching back seems like a recipe for regret...).
I guess I'm a bit pessimistic when it comes to doctors in this field. I know that there are wonderful OBs out there. And to be honest, one of the hardest parts about leaving Florida was knowing that I was leaving my NFP OB... I'm just skeptical about the chances of finding a good one right now.
Because in my experience they're few and far between... And the "experts" who think I'm a brainless idiot for actually adhering to and embracing my religion's teachings abound.
Yup... looking forward to that appointment on the twentieth... I'm really not usually this pessimistic!
I hope that, at the very least, I have a doctor who doesn't make me worry that they might just go ahead and tie my tubes without telling me, because they're so contemptuous of the idea of another pregnancy. With certain doctors, the combination of God complex and contempt for people who have more than two children, have caused such paranoid thoughts to abound (because I totally could see someone like Mr. Make-Fun-of-a-Mom-Who's-Just-Miscarried doing something like that if he thought he could get away with it...).
As I write this post I realize my expectations really are dreadfully low...
Or maybe I'll just be totally passive aggressive and just bring this t-shirt with me to the hospital. Then when I'm asked for the fiftieth time if I'll be going on the pill I can just point and shake my head... and maybe that would help everyone realize that I really am serious:
Or maybe I could use the embroidery feature on my sewing machine to make one that says: "Please Stop Pushing the Carcinogens... My Answer isn't Going to Change... No Matter How Many Times You Ask..."